what have i done?

life has been pretty uneventful lately. I have been writing, writing, writing to finish up an independent study by monday so i'm feeling a bit like summer is passing me by, but even if God only blessed me with what has happened this summer it would already be immeasurably more than I could have ever made happen on my own power. i often wonder if this blog is really to update people on what is happening in my heart, mind, and life, or really for me to just log what is happening for my own benefit. it's really a toss up, but if for nothing else i am going to take the time to make a little list of things i have done recently...

- moved out of a most loved living spot, townhouse 405, to learn how to live life without my bff's there every few hours...weird
- walked across a stage in luckey gymnasium to pick up an IWU diploma holder from Dr. Henry Smith
- drove 1400 miles to a city i don't know, to talk to people i don't know anything about, because i knew God wanted me to do ministry there, only to end up being handed a job that that is seemingly perfect for me
- stayed with the wonderful adam and mindy pierce who are a blessing to my heart for the reassurance and peace they seem to bring about to me, I am sure I don't tell them that enough...
- flew a good 8,000 miles from home to a place that has stolen a piece of my heart, New Zealand
- drove on the left side of the road for a month and managed not to hit anything :)
- was pulled over while driving on the left side of the road...for a reason i am still unsure of
- celebrated mother's day in a nursing home with so many beautiful elderly mums
- stayed in ramarama, the beautiful nz countryside with an amazing couple- geoff & liz naylor
- learned what a heart for ministry looks like from people like brett jones, ruth boswell, josh bowlin, cathy sosoli, and neville gosman
- learned more about what it means to be an imperfect leader that God still manages to work through anyway
- saw gorgeous waterfalls
- learned that food poisoning WILL win no matter how strong your will is...and it hits hard!
- know that it is going to take me a while to eat and enjoy asian food again...
- was able to revisit people and sights and projects that I was involved in in '05 in new zealand
- visited the papakura countdown about 40 times...i don't think that is an exaggeration...
- was introduced to african red bush tea and fell in love!
- watched the history making ground breaking on a $4,000,000 building project for Papakura Wesleyan
- taught my team that a "tim tam slam" is in fact something very real
- decided that international calories don't count especially when eating: pineapple lumps, crumpets, scones, tim tams, shortbread cookies, guacamole, burgerfuel, kumara chips, pastries and chicken tikka masala
- said words like jandals, rubbish, garege, boot, bonnet, toilet, percolated coffee, kiwifruit, jumper, ring, and university A LOT
- learned nz's "american" hot dogs are NOT comparable to actual american hot dogs
- learned tomato sauce and ketchup are very different
- tasted the sweet difference in golden kiwifruit ...mmmmm
- taught a session about seeking God to a group of women who were agnostic but seeking
- played a lot of set, speed scrabble, and dutch blitz
- watched my team not just work together, but become a family and support system for each other
- saw plain ol' college students walk into a community of churches and really touch hearts and lives


my nz team with vania, reuben and their children








- overlooked the city of Auckland from One Tree Hill and North Head
- ate fish and chips
- hiked to fairy falls for a breathtaking view of God's creation!
- went to Bethells beach and Bethells lake for an incredible view of the sunset and time for God to speak directly to my heart
- painted a lot of banners for a children's ministry
- met A LOT of kids! some who really latched onto my heart and i just haven't let go of yet!
- did ministry alongside josh and becca bowlin and played with their beautiful daughters!
- went to lake taupo for a wonderful convention experience in the nz wesleyan methodist church
- went to the place where the towers of hercules were shot as well as gollum's pool
- went up mt. doom and walked around mordor
- "drove the bus" with keith connor and the nz wesleyan church
- was able to set up a night of creative worship for the youth at convention and saw God take hold of their lives
- jumped off a platform on a cliff 154 ft. over the tongariro river with a glorified rubber band attatched to my feet
- was blown away by the crowd of 15 or 20 people who came to send us off at the airport
- used a lot of tears hugging each one of them...a few more hugging goodbye to sara knowing she wouldn't be boarding with me this time
- skipped may 7, and had a 44 hr long june 3
- flew a total of 33 hours
- slept a lot of hours to overcome jet lag
- slowly became addicted to playing wii...and learned it gives my family some good quality time
- took the time to just enjoy being with my mom, dad, grandma, and grandpa
- rediscovered yet again that lauren sheehan makes me laugh and understands even the weirdest things about me :)
- reconnected with two great friends: josh and nichole!
- am currently reading through 650 pgs in books and summarizing them in about 80 pgs of writing
- unfortunately turned down being a counselor at both fairmount camps that i love due to my work load
- now am learning what it looks like to say goodbye to so many people i love as i move...

how does God manage to cram it all in? he is so incredible and packs my life full of blessing. my prayer is that He is glorfied through every bit of it and that my steps follow the gait He has set for me.


lastly...DID I MENTION I WENT BUNGY JUMPING??????? :)


i'm the purple dot!








what a piece of bungy cord looks like...




if you really read all of that post, i am seriously proud of you :)

Life after NZ

So lately I have just been hanging around Bluffton/Marion seeing people and catching up again. It has been good and it's getting to be weird that I am actually moving in 5 weeks. I get more and more excited about my upcoming position as I continue talking about it. Mostly I have been working on this crazy independent study and I cannot wait to finish it!! It will be a relief to finally not have homework for a while.

I've been listening in to some sermons from Water's Edge, the college group at 12 Stone (where I'm going). It's been good listening through them. There's been a quote I have been meditating on since I heard it. It continues to help me reevaluate things.

“I was good intentioned I just didn’t understand the Spirit of God. I thought that He was available to me whenever I wanted Him. The reality is that the Spirit of God inside of you means that you’re available to Him whenever He wants you. And that is the big difference.”

What might life look like if we weren't so disappointed when God didn't do what we wanted and started jumping at the crazy things He asks us to do?

Take it, take another little piece of my heart...

There's a story I read as a child called "If You Give A Mouse A Cookie" that went along a trail saying that if you give a mouse a cookie then he will ask for a glass of milk, then a straw, and when he's done he'll want a napkin, then to look in a mirror to be sure there's no milk mustache, then the mouse is asking for other things in the house and eventually winds up at the end wanting another cookie. Over and over my journey with God is much like this children's book. "If you Give God a bit of your Life..." He'll take it, blow it up bigger than you had imagined, teach you to depend on Him, open your eyes to new ideas, bring new amazing people into your life, give you precious moments with Him, and when that experience is all over He'll be right there saying, "How about another piece?"

This trip was a prime example of this happening again. I cannot begin to tell you all the names, stories, and places of New Zealand that touched my life, but it was a complete God experience. I know there were many of you truly lifting me up in prayer throughout it all and I really appreciate it. We were able to see so many beautiful sites in NZ and just view the beautiful landscape that only He could put together. The team was able to be a part of so many different ministries from kids clubs, to youth ministry, to cleaning an unlivable home, to working with mothers, to loving on the elderly, to pulling weeds, to various painting/construction projects and ended with a wonderful time ministering with the 21 Wesleyan churches in NZ. There were so many wonderful relationships formed and it was apparent as we were flying out. Around 20 or so people from the churches there came to send us off with kind words, warm hugs, and parting tears. The connection there runs deep and does not end as we know that God is over it all. Certainly ministry did not first begin when we stepped foot into the country and it has not ended after we left. His watchful love is over all that continues on there, but my heart still yearns for the souls of people in NZ. My feeble ideas, worries, and fears about the trip were simply obliterated once in the country and moving in the power of the Holy Spirit.

Jet lag hasn't been awful, but I have slept quite a bit, and I am not disciplining myself very well to get back on Indiana time...whoops. I'll get there soon enough! I'd love to share more about the trip and if you want to hear stories I'd love to hear from you! Feel free to give me a call...I plan on staying in the country for a little while now. :)

When God asks you to take a big step, don't be afraid to just pick up your foot and see where He lets it land! You won't be disappointed.

"Therefore because we have such a hope, we are very bold" -Paul, Second letter to the Corinthians 3:12

NZ!

I am finishing my packing for New Zealand and realized that I am neglecting to really post about the trip! I am, no doubt, still very excited about it! God has been working in my heart since May of 2005 to prepare for this and now on Tuesday it will finally take place! There are 7 other wonderful IWU students going with me and we are going to be doing many different things over there to serve and encourage the New Zealand Wesleyan churches. We fly out at 1 pm on May 6, skip May 7, and land in New Zealand at 5 am on May 8. We are running a Kids Klub at Papakura Wesleyan Church every Thursday and at the end of our trip helping with a national convention that brings all the different churches and cultures together. Other than that we are just trusting and knowing He will do great things through us if we are available!

We will be flying back June 3 and because of the 17 hour time difference...we will have 44 hours of June 3. :) I should finally be home June 4. If you would like to read our updates, they are on a blog.

www.wimay08.wordpress.com
username: maytrips08
password: worldimpact08

You will need the username and password to log into it and my posts will be labeled with New Zealand in the title. We will be trying to update as often as possible, but no news is good news! :)

I covet your prayers for us during this time. Please be praying that we will see opportunities for God to use us there and that His protection will be over us physically, mentally, emotionally, and spiritually. Thank you!

'Tis SO Sweet

Since around February there has been a recurring song in my life. It's the old hymn "'Tis So Sweet to Trust in Jesus" over and over this would come up at church, in chapel, walking through a building, in classes...really, truly everywhere. And every time it just made me really emotional. Probably because of the whole stepping out after graduation deal. I want to know what really trusting Him looks like. And I know that's a dangerous thing to ask, but I really do seek after it. So whether it's figuring out moving hundreds of miles from my family or going to opposite hemispheres, yeah there are anxious feelings that well up, but this song keeps bringing me back to center.

Being the google nerd that I am...I found out a pretty amazing story about it's composer. The song was written by a woman, Louisa M. R. Stead. Out of one of her darkest hours—the tragic drowning of her husband.
Louisa Stead was born in England. She felt the call of God upon her life for missionary service. She arrived in America in 1871. In 1875, Louisa married a Mr. Stead, and to this union was born a daughter, Lily. When the child was four years of age, the family decided one day to enjoy the sunny beach at Long Island Sound, New York.
While eating their picnic lunch, they suddenly heard cries of help and spotted a drowning boy in the sea. Mr. Stead charged into the water. As often happens, however, the struggling boy pulled his rescuer under the water with him, and both drowned before the terrified eyes of wife and daughter.
And out of her struggle with God during the ensuing days, flowed these meaningful words—“Tis so sweet to trust in Jesus.”
Taken from: (http://www.tanbible.com/tol_sng/tissosweettotrustinjesus.htm)

God has put some huge opportunities ahead of me. They are so much bigger than who I am, but I pray that through it I learn over and over how to lean on Him.


’Tis so sweet to trust in Jesus, And to take Him at His Word; Just to rest upon His promise, And to know, “Thus says the Lord!”

Jesus, Jesus, how I trust Him! How I’ve proved Him o’er and o’er Jesus, Jesus, precious Jesus! O for grace to trust Him more!

O how sweet to trust in Jesus, Just to trust His cleansing blood; And in simple faith to plunge me ’Neath the healing, cleansing flood!

Yes, ’tis sweet to trust in Jesus, Just from sin and self to cease; Just from Jesus simply taking Life and rest, and joy and peace.

I’m so glad I learned to trust Thee, Precious Jesus, Savior, Friend; And I know that Thou art with me, Wilt be with me to the end.

Something New...

Well, I never post on this, but as I am approaching on this new season of life I'm realizing I need to try to keep up with it more so that I keep in contact with so many of you! So, where to start on the updates...

I had a great senior year at IWU. I lived with some of my closest friends and made new and I have so many memories from it that are still making me laugh. A few of us went on a cruise to the Bahamas (it was WAY cheap or we wouldn't have done it...much love to travelocity) for Spring Break and that was amazing! On the way down and back we stayed with a couple friends, Adam and Mindy Pierce, in Atlanta as they were gracious enough to let 4 college girls all over their home for a few days. It was a fun time to see them again after their time in Sri Lanka.

Now prior to this time I was really thinking I would probably be working at IWU after graduation...like so many do, and work as an admissions counselor. After all, I had worked there a few years as a student worker, so it seemed to make sense, right? Well, as we left this trip and were driving out of Atlanta, I continued feeling the presence of the Lord pressing me to seek out Atlanta further. I was there on a mission trip in 2002, but other than that had few connections to ministry there. I just kept praying about it, asking virtually every trusted person in my life what they thought about the idea, and googling like crazy. I had no ideas or plans, but there was an overwhelming peace that I should be there. So, I emailed random ministries and they forwarded to other ministries and before I knew it I had a road trip planned with quite a few meetings. While school was still in a couple pastors from 12 Stone, a Wesleyan church just outside of Atlanta, came to interview some students for intern positions at their church. A lot of people had told me to check it out, but for some reason I wasn't sure I wanted to. After about a 20 minute conversation with them my entire mindset was changed. Which...if you've had a taste of my stubbornness doesn't happen easily. :) So, I was really beginning to see that the it was the Spirit nudging me here.

April 26 (this past Saturday) I graduated from IWU with degrees in Adolescent Ministry and Intercultural Studies. As of Monday, I drove to Atlanta to seek out opportunities there. I met with various ministries Tuesday and Wednesday. Each one of them I felt like I could do, but in praying about them there was nothing pulling me toward any of them. Wednesday afternoon I met with Miles, the college/intern pastor, had some good meetings and decided to stay Thursday for their college service and to hang out with his amazing assistant, Stacey, for lunch. Talking with people I've heard a lot of good about the church, but so much of it was confirmed being there. I can't explain it, because I know it's not a me thing. All this to say, last night (Thurs.) Miles offered me a position there as an intern. I will be working with the Community/ Global Outreach area of their ministry for the next two years. The move will probably happen around the second week of August, so I'm still around for a little bit. It seems like a really sudden decision from the outside, but this is something God has been solidifying in my heart for longer than I can even tell you. How incredible that God even cares about my peace of mind that I could know this before I leave for a month...just amazing.

Tuesday (May 6) I leave to lead a team of 7 IWU students on a mission trip to New Zealand and I will be there until June 3, then doing a couple youth camps for Indiana North in Fairmount the second and third week of June, and a missions trip with Voices of Power to Philly in July. I'm hoping to have some sort of moving away party in late July so look forward to details for that! In the mean time, I'd love to be able to see you and hang out! Thank you for coming by my blog...leave a comment and let me know you were here. :) Blessings, Cami

Pray for Kenya...

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/22460182/

I just saw this article on msnbc.com...this could easily
become another Rwanda or Darfur. Makes my heart
heavy.

Please pray.

Because this is how I feel right now...

Take me back to the time
When I was maybe eight or nine
And I believed
When Jesus walked on waters blue
And if He helped me, I could too
If I believed

Before rationale, analysis and systematic thinking
Robbed me of a sweet simplicity
When wonders and when mysteries
Were far less often silly dreams
And childhood fantasies

Help me believe
'Cause I don't want to miss any miracles
Maybe I'd see much better by closing my eyes
And I would shed this grownup skin I'm in
To touch an angel's wing
And I would be free
Help me believe

When mustard seeds made mountains move
A burning bush that spoke for You was good enough
When manna fell from heavens high
Just because You told the sky to open up

Am I too wise to recognise that everything uncertain
Is certainly a possibility?
When logic fails my reasoning
And science crushes underneath
The weight of all that is unseen

Help me believe
'Cause I don't want to miss any miracles
Maybe I'd see much better by closing my eyes
And I would shed this grownup skin I'm in
To touch an angel's wing
And I would be free
Help me believe

When someone else's education
Plays upon my reservations
I'm the first to cave, I'm the first to bleed

If I abandon all that seeks
To make my faith informed and chic
Could You, would You show Yourself to me?

Help me believe
'Cause I don't want to miss any miracles
Maybe I'd see much better by closing my eyes
And I would shed this grownup skin I'm in
To touch an angel's wing
And I would be free
Help me believe

Random...

Best, Last, Today, Tomorrow, Favorite, Currently.

Best...
[1.] Male friend: Josh
[2.] Female friend: My Mom...but there are several others in the running. :)
[3.] Cousin: Lori.
[4.] Vacation: Cayman until it was cut short...
[5.] Time of Day: Evening
[6.] Day of the week: Friday!
[7.] Memory: oh my word...as of late it is the entire experience Saturday night at the haunted corn maze...definitely climbing the charts

Last...
[1.] Person you saw: sarah
[2.] Talked to on the phone: my dad
[3.] Text: Josh
[4.] Imed: Zach
[5.] Talk to over myspace: who knows...
[6.] To hug you: don't remember...probably Lauren
[7.] To kiss: really?

Today...
[1.] What are you doing now?: procrastinating
[2.] What are you wearing right now? striped pj pants, t-shirt, zippy shirt
[3.] Better than yesterday? i suppose

Tomorrow...
[1.] Is: wednesday
[2.] Got any plans: class.chapel.class.class.class.heather dinner. homework.
[3.] Dislikes about tomorrow: there are four classes and chapel...

Favorite...
[1.] Number: 23
[2.] Food: guacamole and chips
[3.] Color: green, purple
[4.] Season: fall.
[5.] Candy: dark chocolate
[6.] Flower: lilys
[7.] Scent: aqua di gio

Currently...
[1.] Missing: summer...
[2.] Mood: girly
[3.] Wanting: nah, not here.

Random...
Do you know anyone named David? a few, yes.

Ever kissed anyone with the name starting with a J? not yet.

Where is your cell phone? beside me

Say you were given a drug test right now. Would you pass or fail?
pass with flying colors

Are you taller than 5'6“? 5'9''

Ever drove into the ghetto to buy drugs? not to buy drugs...

Last restaurant you went to? cracker barrel.

What is the weather like today? colder.

What did you do yesterday? classes, worked, dinner, homework, gospel choir, hung out, homework...

How many hours did you sleep for last night? around 6 ish

If all of your friends were going on a road trip, would you? of course

Have you cried today? maybe.

Do you think that someone is thinking about you right now? i suppose it's possible.

Do you untie your shoes every time you take them off? not always.

What is the color of your bedsheets? Cream

Are you photogenic? not generally...

Do you have a tattoo? nope

Have you ever changed your clothes while in a vehicle? of course.

What were you doing at 2am last night? going to sleep.

Favorite Disney movie? cinderella!

What is the wallpaper on your cellphone? NYC from the Empire State Building at night

Have you kissed somebody in the last 2 weeks? nope.

Last beverage you had? Non-fat Sugar-free Mocha with Raspberry ;)

Interesting Article from J.K. Rowling...

Thought she had some interesting thoughts about the emphasis we, yes, myself included, put on appearance. Check it out and gain a little confidence. :)

For Girls Only, Probably...
-J.K. Rowling

Being thin. Probably not a subject that you ever expected to read about on this website, but my recent trip to London got me thinking...

It started in the car on the way to Leavesden film studios. I whiled away part of the journey reading a magazine that featured several glossy photographs of a very young woman who is either seriously ill or suffering from an eating disorder (which is, of course, the same thing); anyway, there is no other explanation for the shape of her body. She can talk about eating absolutely loads, being terribly busy and having the world's fastest metabolism until her tongue drops off (hooray! Another couple of ounces gone!), but her concave stomach, protruding ribs and stick-like arms tell a different story. This girl needs help, but, the world being what it is, they're sticking her on magazine covers instead. All this passed through my mind as I read the interview, then I threw the horrible thing aside.

But blow me down if the subject of girls and thinness didn't crop up shortly after I got out of the car. I was talking to one of the actors and, somehow or other, we got onto the subject of a girl he knows (not any of the Potter actresses – somebody from his life beyond the films) who had been dubbed 'fat' by certain charming classmates. (Could they possibly be jealous that she knows the boy in question? Surely not!)

'But,' said the actor, in honest perplexity, 'she is really not fat.'

'"Fat" is usually the first insult a girl throws at another girl when she wants to hurt her,' I said; I could remember it happening when I was at school, and witnessing it among the teenagers I used to teach. Nevertheless, I could see that to him, a well-adjusted male, it was utterly bizarre behaviour, like yelling 'thicko!' at Stephen Hawking.

His bemusement at this everyday feature of female existence reminded me how strange and sick the 'fat' insult is. I mean, is 'fat' really the worst thing a human being can be? Is 'fat' worse than 'vindictive', 'jealous', 'shallow', 'vain', 'boring' or 'cruel'? Not to me; but then, you might retort, what do I know about the pressure to be skinny? I'm not in the business of being judged on my looks, what with being a writer and earning my living by using my brain...

I went to the British Book Awards that evening. After the award ceremony I bumped into a woman I hadn't seen for nearly three years. The first thing she said to me? 'You've lost a lot of weight since the last time I saw you!'

'Well,' I said, slightly nonplussed, 'the last time you saw me I'd just had a baby.'

What I felt like saying was, 'I've produced my third child and my sixth novel since I last saw you. Aren't either of those things more important, more interesting, than my size?' But no – my waist looked smaller! Forget the kid and the book: finally, something to celebrate!

So the issue of size and women was (ha, ha) weighing on my mind as I flew home to Edinburgh the next day. Once up in the air, I opened a newspaper and my eyes fell, immediately, on an article about the pop star Pink.

Her latest single, 'Stupid Girls', is the antidote-anthem for everything I had been thinking about women and thinness. 'Stupid Girls' satirises the talking toothpicks held up to girls as role models: those celebrities whose greatest achievement is un-chipped nail polish, whose only aspiration seems to be getting photographed in a different outfit nine times a day, whose only function in the world appears to be supporting the trade in overpriced handbags and rat-sized dogs.

Maybe all this seems funny, or trivial, but it's really not. It's about what girls want to be, what they're told they should be, and how they feel about who they are. I've got two daughters who will have to make their way in this skinny-obsessed world, and it worries me, because I don't want them to be empty-headed, self-obsessed, emaciated clones; I'd rather they were independent, interesting, idealistic, kind, opinionated, original, funny – a thousand things, before 'thin'. And frankly, I'd rather they didn't give a gust of stinking chihuahua flatulence whether the woman standing next to them has fleshier knees than they do. Let my girls be Hermiones, rather than Pansy Parkinsons. Let them never be Stupid Girls. Rant over.